I have so much sadness and frustration surrounding how individuals who were once friends, allies or even family, use religion to control, damage or sever relationships. I have posted about these situation at various times on this blog.
Today I read something on a blog that (IMHO) gets it right. Something I wish those aforementioned friends and family would be able to really and truly internalize and live.
Quote: So what is it about? Forget the rules. Forget the religion. My faith is grounded in a relationship with a person. A person who’s an example of how to live right. … Someone who knows me – who really knows me – and who chooses to love me anyway. Someone who has the authority – and chooses to use it – to forgive me my biggest mistakes. Someone who keeps on giving me second chances. Someone who frees me to get up, brush myself down, and try to do better next time.
The person in Jesus.
YES! I would even add “Amen!” Why is it that Christians hide behind “love…” while cracking a bat to the back of your knees with “…but, hate the sin”? I have long commented “everything after the ‘but’ is true.” That is exactly how it feels. It is so disingenuous to hear “I love you, oh… but I hate who you are.”
These musings today remind me of the most recent email I received back from the (former) friend once I commented “oh yeah, and it is not a lifestyle… it is my life.”
Quote: If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. 1 Corinthians 13:2What happens from here is in His hands. {regarding whether our friendship
remains} I would agree with your statement that where you are/who you are now is a life, but it is a life of your choosing, not the life God wants you to have. And that is where our roads diverge. I have and will always love you. If ever you need me, you know how to find me. Blessings.
I don’t see Jesus anywhere in that… do you?
I have not replied back after that. I don’t believe anything I say would be “heard”…
It would definitely not be heard and doesn’t sound like it’s worth it. I have been following your blog for a while because I am fascinated by your stories.
Do you go to church somewhere?
I have been so turned off by everything church-related (which is a big deal for me, because it used to be such a big part of my life) for a while now, but now I am becoming interested in the Unitarian Universalist church. Do you know anything about them or have you thought about going somewhere like that?
I love that “find room for me in your life if you want to” quote. Wow. That sort of says it all. But what happens if they don’t want to? It’s still you and I that have to deal with the rejection and missing friend……sigh. Life is a real bitch sometimes.
Keep on keepin’ on. You’re doing great
Thank you D.M. for your input here… that is my hunch… that it would not be heard or understood, and frankly isn’t worth anymore of my energy. In OR. I had attended a small Lutheran church for 4 or 5 years… mostly because the pastor was excellent. I have not found a church in PA. yet. I have visited a U.U.C– definitely an open affirming experience! I should check into it. Let me know what you find if you go!
I know Arnie, isn’t that amazing? Your question is the crux of the issue… they “choose” to discard people whose “lifestyle” they don’t agree with… and it is indeed you and I that deal with the all too real rejection and missing of someone we thought we could trust and love.
Thank you much D.M.! Much appreciated! Thank you for putting your words out there!
the bright side of all this (if there truly IS one), is the plethora of funny, amazing, insightful, colorful pics we get out of it.
when there’s nothing left at all, just keep laughing…..and *sigh*ing…….
For me your last graphic says it all. Let go of what kills you and hold on to what keeps you breathing. I love that so much. I think as we apply that truth to our lives bit by bit we probably do find ourselves releasing old relationships that used to feel like a spiritual bond. But if the bond becomes a gag, then releasing is the only way to go…
I’m workin’ on that issue in a couple of places in my life right now… thanks for these insights.
M.S.– yes! I love that graphic… and placed it at the end of this post as a reminder to myself. It is time to let go of the toxic things and embrace that which keeps me breathing! You’re welcome… and thanks for sharing here!
A post full of sayings to remember and reflect on.
So true Steven! Chocked full of things to elucidate on.